A wiping technique. Wrapping toilet paper around one's hand so that one can fully clean one's "area" without getting "matter" on one's hand.
Dave and Maggie went out for Mexican. Dave had a salad, so he was OK, but Maggie had such a bad reaction to her chimichangas, she was on the john all night and had to use a Michigan Mud Mitt to properly clean herself.
A show involving bright lights, a dark stage, mics that don't make anything loud unless you're backstage, cursing with your headset accidentally on. It is custom-made costumes that are 9 sizes to big or 4 sizes too small, it is the reason why we stay at school until 9 on a weeknight. It is dancing, it is singing, it is working hard for 2 months just to walk out of the dressing rooms and get a flower from the guy who swore he'd never be caught dead in that auditorium. It is showing the assholes that a freshman can get a solo and be better than half the seniors. It is that place we go to to whine about having to stay and cry when at the final end, it's time to go. A place where even the most perverted geniuses are forever respected. In the end though, "Y'all suck."
"Blast from the Past is the only thing that could make me wear purple spandex."