2 definitions by Kristopher Smith

The conditioning of most retail shoppers to provide preconceived answers to customer service providers.
Here are a few instances using Programmed Retail Response:

(Upon a customer entering)
Associate: "How's the weather today?"
Shopper: "I'm fine. How are you?"

(Upon a customer leaving)
Associate: "Fuel for Satan's fire!"
Shopper: "Thanks. You too!"
von Kristopher Smith 24. Mai 2007
1. slang for a common whore of the Old West. 2. a subtle term for addressing modern whores who get confused when unfamiliar words are used.
man: "Hey, devil-breasted mattress thatcher, what did I tell you about putting your skeezy hands on me?"
ho: "Huh?"
man: "Exactly. Make like a tree and piss off."
von Kristopher Smith 24. Mai 2007

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