A corporation masquerading as a religion and only succeeding as a cult; a major bringer of lulz unless they're killing off members of their congregation or disconnecting families. Lovers of free speech unless the free speech is being used against them, in which case they will stalk you and sue your ass faster than a fat kid pissed at McDonalds. Run by a midget who is BFF with Tom Cruise. Exists to give members of Chanology something to do other than sit around and fap all day. Their religion runs towards asking for moar monies and making fields of wildflowers for Tom Cruise to run through.
Also, they hate the gays.
The Church of Scientology defines scientology as "the study of truth." The rest of the world defines them as masters of the footbullet.